tanglebuddies

More writing from Facebook, in reply to this comment on a friend’s wall:

I don’t believe in patriarchy in the West, at all. Here’s a good vlogger, a woman, who tells a different tale.
http://youtu.be/vp8tToFv-bA

If you watch all here videos on the subject you may walk away from feminism and just embrace humanism.

My response:

Just because one woman does not feel that her gender has closed doors for her or lead her to be objectified, ignored, belittled, or not taken seriously doesn’t mean that her experience invalidates those of other women. Don’t believe in patriarchy in the west? Here’s just one clear example to the contrary: http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2006/07/060714174545.htm

Feminism is not about valuing women over men any more than civil rights is about valuing African Americans over Whites, or LGBT activism is about valuing gay relationships over straight ones. Fighting for the rights of an unequal group is not a claim that those who are not in that group do not have problems of their own. It does not invalidate those problems. Feminism is the belief that women and men should have equal rights and opportunities. That’s it. If you believe that, you are a feminist. This idea that feminism is Out To Get Men is reactionary bullshit perpetrated by people clinging to traditional gender roles—the kind of people who would’ve felt their entire way of life was being threatened were they alive when women won the right to vote.

Men’s problems are not ignored, as this woman seems to think. Men’s problems are the majority of what’s discussed in politics—you just don’t recognize them as “men’s problems” because they’re framed as “human problems”, and as a society we are used to thinking of men as the default and women as the other. The prison population is overwhelmingly male? Yep, that’s true. Does ‘girlwriteswhat’ want more women to be in jail, or to die in the workplace, to make things more equal? I highly doubt that. There have been political discussions about workers’ rights to a safe workplace. There have been political discussions about the out-of-control prison population. These are the “men’s rights” discussions she believes are missing.

The “put women and children first” mentality she’s describing is actually at the forefront of current feminist concerns—women in this scenario are not valued because of who they are as people, or because of their thoughts, their beliefs, talents, etc., they are valued because of their reproductive systems. Lately this has manifested itself in the GOP’s crusade against contraception, which clearly demonstrates how widespread the belief is that women are worth nothing if they choose to pursue something beyond having children. The people who are fighting against this are feminists.

Feminism IS humanism. It’s humanism that acknowledges that women are still denied many opportunities that men are, that ideas that come from women are still treated differently than those that come from men, and that men and women both would be better off in a society where people of both genders are able to contribute to their full capacity. Being a feminist is about decency and practicality and self-respect. I have no desire to walk away from believing in my gender.